How to be happy in life

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”

I am trying to unfold this quotation from great scientist Albert Einstein.

We always have expectation from other persons, things, life etc. When this expectation does not get fulfill, we become sad and if expectation gets fulfil it is the moment of happiness. When you go to a five star hotel you expect a high quality service, an excellent food and awesome ambiance and if you don't get this you feel dissatisfied and disappointed.

In technical terms, there is a zone of expectation with upper and lower bound. Lower bound is the minimum expectation like if I go to my uncle's house at least I get a cup of tea. Upper bound determines the highest expectation beyond which I don't expect anything, like in my uncle's house I never expect more than one time meal with regular sabji and roti. The zone of expectation also gives rises to lower and higher zone of expectation. Lower zone of expectation is below lower bound and similarly upper zone of expectation is above upper bound. Anything which lies in lower zone make a person unhappy and dissatisfied because I expected a cup of tea and I did not get even a glass of water - Not fulfilling the expectation. Anything which lies in upper zone make a person delight and not just happy because I expected simple lunch and my uncle provided the lunch with ice-cream and mithai. 

______________________________

Upper zone ---> delight

------------(Upper zone)------------

zone of expectation - happy

------------(lower zone)------------

lower zone ---> unhappy

_______________________________

The width of zone of expectation determines the probability of happiness. Greater the width larger the probability of happiness and narrow width increases your chance of being unhappy (considering there is very less probability of delight). It is thus advisable to increase the width of zone of expectation by lowering the lower bound. That means stop expecting. Yes, this is the best way to be happy. It has been found that the biggest reason of unhappiness is because of problems in relationship. The problems arise because of the expectation. We expect too much and the other person is unable to fulfill it.

If you lower your expectation it is likely that you will be happy more often. Most of the expectation is tied to other person and things. If you start expecting less or untying the happiness with person and things you become more happy.

It is better to have high expectation from yourself. Aim higher and expect to achieve it. Nobody will help you to achieve your target and even do not expect it. That is why Albert Einstein said  “If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”.

The other is a hell..

I love movies. I am a movie freak and I watch them because they are not real. I am already living a real world. Whenever I enter a movie hall, I expect that the movie will entertain me but the problem arises when movie start depicting the real world. The same problem is with Zora Khan directed "Luck By Chance". It is too realistic and too slow. It got the 4/5 stars from the best critics in the country but for me it is worth of one star and too because of Hrithik Roshan's dance number.  

This also form the basis of my disliking of Madhur Bhandarkar's movies. 

But what I gain from "Luck by chance" is this blog title. Nobody in this world is perfect. Every person on this earth is gray and nether black nor white. Black denotes the darker side of a person, the evil, the hell and Beelzebub. On the other side white is pure, sacred, sanctified representing GOD. Human beings have the qualities of both the worlds. He is mixture of achha and bura, therefore he is gray. Today movies are showing the same human characteristics.

In real life, we also look for black and white side of person. We never see him as gray and since black get highlighted very easily we started treated him like devil. We should remember moon is very beautiful but still it has black spots. Sun gives energy, light and make life possible on earth but still it is made up of hot gasses - and if you want to touch it, your hands will get burned. We always consider rose to be very beautiful without considering it has thorns. We always say Ravana was monster but he was the biggest devotee of Lord Shiva. 

We always appreciate Coca Coal for making great rural marketing strategy and coming up with 200ml coke bottle and we forget that coke is responsible for water shortage in many villages where they have their plants in operations. The problem is that we never want to accept a fact that every human being is mixture of black and white and that we fail in relationships.

The only solution to the problem is that we should stop reading others mind especially when you are in some kind of relationship like husband/wife or friends. Do not try to estimate what my friend think of me. It is not important because the more important is what I think of my friend. If someone loves me and I don't then I cannot stop him. If you try to read the other person minds you always find a 'hell' because every person is mixture of black and white and we identify black stronger than white.